MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN. LETTERS TO LAYPEOPLE
Pravoslavie.ru (English edition) is therefore pleased to present each week day excerpts from the forthcoming book May God Give You Wisdom! The Letters of Fr. John Krestiankin (published by Sretensky Monastery and St. Xenia Skete). May our readers find in them answers to perplexities, sober instruction, and deep Christian wisdom, coming from a true elder and confessor of the Faith.
Letter to a beginner
Dear N.!
Everything will be very simple and easy if you decide to do it unto God, for God's sake, and to the glory of God. Everything in life and in the soul will immediately come together.
Do not leave your job, live on your salary from the museum, and work at home for your soul. Do not accept gifts, and do not count on getting your only profit from payment for icons.
Work in the museum for now, and the time will come when you will only work in the church, even better, in a monastery.[1] But now you should gain experience and knowledge, and raise your level of qualification, study where you can. If they find out about your domestic practice at work, then you can explain it easily by saying, “I am doing it to get practice in restoration work and increase my experience, but I do not take money.” After all, your work is knowingly and consciously serving God, and not mammon. Do you understand?
You must also learn that no matter where you work, especially if it's in the Church, there will always be many disappointments and disenchantments, because people are people everywhere, with each one's “plusses” and “minuses.”
You need to learn to be condescending to people's infirmities, and to always remember that God's Providence teaches a lesson in spiritual life in every situation. So we learn from the moment we become aware of ourselves to the moment of our death.
In taking on anyone's new order, be careful, and do not agree to take it right away.
When you have made sense of what has been asked of you and learned that there is a true need, only fulfill it, and do not even deliver it yourself, but ask your mother or some other trusted person to do it.
Then all will be well and your despondency will depart. Despondency itself is born of self-love and pride, and there will be no “end” to these causes. What “end” can there be when we ourselves are only at the very beginning? Life is wonderful, and God arranges all for the better, for our salvation.
My child, learn one very important lesson, and learn it for your whole life. Do not rush forward into tomorrow, but live in the present day, learn today to see God's will for yourself in the present moment, and not only to see it, but to have the unwavering resolve to fulfill it.
Thus will you live guided by God. You need to forget your likes and dislikes, and accept God's will.
With time and experience you will understand that our complete good lies only in what is done according to God's will. Read spiritual books, the lives of saints, and until you have developed a taste for such reading, begin with Feodor Dostoevsky. Read it and try to understand what it is saying. But thinking about the “end” is a great sin. You must repent immediately and not think about this, drive away with prayer this thought from the enemy. Sign yourself with the sign of the cross with the words, “In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.”
Read the Creed more often, as well as the “Our Father…” Call for help to the Heavenly Queen, the fervent Intercessor, and your Protectress [patron saint] from the time you were an infant.
Learn the fiftieth Psalm by heart “Have mercy on me, O God…”, the twenty-four short evening prayers of St. John Chrysostom, and at the very moment of the enemy's attack, call upon the Holy Spirit—“O Heavenly King, Comforter, Spirit of truth.…” All of your “ends” will fly away. Do not converse with the enemy's thoughts, do not develop this thought, but immediately cut it off by prayer. Even if this prayer is mechanical at first, the Name of the Lord will do its work—not you, but the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Your job is only to ask, cry out, and knock at the door of God's mercy. Thus it should be to the final hour: “Lord, help me. Lord, save me.” Your guardian angel will help you.
The Lord and the Mother of God will strengthen you in faith, hope, and love for God, your neighbor, and for yourself. Never, not even to yourself, count where, what and how you have done good. My dear, it is all from God and for God. Remember this. He only needs your heart—loving and faithful to Him, our Lord, Creator, and Redeemer.
Labor in peace to the glory of His Holy Name.
Also, in order to paint well, you should make as many copies as possible and have good examples; if you have the opportunity, get them from Maria Nikolaevna Sokolova. Copy them and save them, and do not give them out to anyone, so that you will always have these copies as examples.
If you enter into this work, everything will come together in its time.
During your work do not let your mind run around from “end to end.” Our life is endless—a ring or circle in God and with God. We can do nothing without Him. Accept it as your main work in life to ask for help from the Almighty, All-good God for everything and always, and do not flounder. Where there is “I,” there is a proud demon.
Remember this! Our work is only: “Lord help me, for I am weak! Lord save me! Lord help me to carry my cross without murmuring.”
My child, do not give the Lord cause to wrath and do not defile yourself with thoughts from the enemy.
May the Lord help you in all things, dear N.
We pray for you and remember you.
[1]This came to pass twelve years after this letter, in 1981.
ONE GOAL, DIFFERENT PATHS
He takes our troubles on Himself
Choose your path
Be the salt of the earth
The Lord sees your heart
Pray!
Best not to murmur at all
Live for God
You can't be too late for God
Do not lose your equilibrium
Tonsure should be preceded by resolve
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Fr. John and Fr. Victor Shipovalnikov. A. Solzhenitzyn wrote of Fr. Victor's sufferings in The Gulag Archipelago. |
Dear in the Lord M.!
There is no such refuge as the one about which you write, not for the monk, nor for the layman—in everything and always, for the whole of one's life, there is only endless trekking, labor, and sickness, for the monk as well as the layman. The paths are a little different, but the goal is the same. Do not break the world into two parts—the world and the monastery. There is monastic life and family life, and both are blessed by God. But whoever chooses his path should not be double-minded and swing back forth between the world and the monastery.
The old Russian saying is not without wisdom: measure seven times and cut once. This is something that we have forgotten how to do. We do not think things over and try things on, we just cut and cut carelessly, and it all turns out pretty painful. I do not know any elders who try to invade upon the Divine determination which says that people up to the last days of the world will marry and give birth, raise their children, and be saved through this. People must do what they are able to do on their life's path. The Lord blesses one thing for one person, another thing for another.
I am an old man, and during the time of my youth, when the traditional order of life was clearly falling apart, grace-endowed people were not so bold as to announce the end of history.
Now there are a lot of bold ones, but we have to go on living, we have to save ourselves, and God's mercy is the same as it always was; but we have become so much cruder that only tangible blows in life bring us a little closer to an awareness of our fragility and turn us to God.
There is no peace. There never is peace, and the Lord brought not peace to the world, but a sword. Now this sword of the Lord severs to the uttermost depths, while comfort, consolation, and an understanding of what is happening can be only in Faith, only in God and with God. May God grant this main awareness, and your soul will then come to thirst for life in the world with God alone, for God alone, and for people in God.
May God grant you wisdom!
Give thanks to God for everything. That we have found ourselves in the Church is not our right, but a gift of God. Acquaint yourself more deeply with the life of St. John Chrysostom. He will console you, he will help.
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Архимандрит Иоанн (Крестьянкин) |
Dear O.!
There is Someone who knows about all our troubles. Not one troubled thought of ours slips by Him. He knows that troubles cause suffering. That is why He always wants to help us. He promises to take all our troubles upon Himself. Could we have anything better? He wants to take away everything that weighs upon us. He wants to pave a pathway for us in those regions where we do not see any way out. He wants to change all the conditions that burden us. He wants to send us help.
Therefore, give all your troubles over to Him. Give thanks to Him for taking everything upon Himself and giving you aid in these troubles that are grieving you today. If you do this, your heart will be filled with peace.
Labor where the Lord leads you
Dear in the Lord V.!
Do not rush. Why do you pay so much attention to those around you? You should be looking more into yourself and living according to your conscience. The sick everywhere need treatment—in the Kremlin or in the villages—people are people everywhere. So, labor wherever the Lord leads you.
Pray to the Holy Martyr Tryphon.
May God give you wisdom!MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Pskov. In the Holy Trinity Cathedral, by the relics |
C., every man has to choose his own life's path. This is so that no one can hide behind another person's back.
Think through everything well. There are only two paths blessed by God: family and solitary—monastic.
Both of these paths are of the cross. So, make your choice, which cross is more suitable for your salvation.
May God give you wisdom!
Your first blessing after you have chosen should be that of your parents, and the second, that of your father confessor.
Get to know yourself
Dear M.!
It would be good for you to work as a chef, and until you are twenty-five years old, root yourself in Orthodox life and in the Church, getting to know yourself. There is no need for you at this point to discuss monasticism or marriage. That would be all too early. You need to grow some more in order to choose your cross consciously and responsibly. Also, remember that without your parents' blessing you should neither join a monastery nor start a family. Work also on bringing your parents to God. There is no other way.
May the Lord give you wisdom.MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Schema-Archimandrite Seraphim (Romanstov) and Hieroschemamonk Macary (Eremenko), elders from Glinsk Hermitage, who spiritually guided Fr. John during his Riazan years. |
Pray to the Holy Martyr Tryphon, and through his intercessions you will always have work. Go to church to pray, and help whomever you can, but your main work should be your occupation in the world.
Believers should be the salt of the earth, and not close themselves up to people. Preach not so much with words as with your life, your patience and love towards suffering and lost people.
Do not look too far ahead, and if you will live every day with God and with prayer, the Lord will draw your little boat through life and direct it toward salvation.
May the Lord preserve you and make you wise!
Do your work with prayer
Dear in the Lord A.!
Live at home and labor to the glory of God in the field that the Lord has given you. It is our business to do our work with prayer, and the result will come from God. You see that the question of an apartment is resolved—a confirmation that you need to remain at home.
May God give you wisdom!
Masseurs are needed everywhere. And the sick woman died because her time had come; God called her.
Look into your heart
Dear A.!
I will not refuse to pray for you, but neither I, nor your mother, nor your father confessor can make your choice for you. Only look thoughtfully and with prayer into your own heart. Do not rush.
Nowadays, when people have lost the fear of God, they often dare to break their vows: marital, monastic, and priestly —this is a sign of the times. Every man is therefore answerable before God and man for what he has chosen.
Read the works of St. John Climacus about family and marriage, acquaint yourself with thepodvigs[1] of monastic life from the works of the Fathers, and think deeply about one and the other. Those who try to talk you out of monastic life do not know its joys and sorrows, and make a one-sided judgment based only upon what they themselves know. Do not rush, but at the same time do not put off gaining a theoretical knowledge about both [marriage and monasticism].
We will pray for you!
[1]The Russian word podvig cannot be directly translated into English. It implies an ascetic labor, struggle, or accomplishment [trans.].
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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Dear K.!
A. has not made his life's decision, you are not yet free, and everything is still ahead of you. Everyone has to make his own decision. Therefore, enjoy life, do what God has blessed you to do with love and eagerness: warm the souls of the sick and suffering, and paint icons.
Pray for A. and for yourself, and do not look into the future. The Lord in His good time will decide your future. After all, He sees your hearts. Only be steadfast in your choice.
May the Lord give you wisdom!
When your choice becomes a vow
Dear in the Lord M.!
Your answer does not have power, for it was given unconsciously, and, I might say, entirely without any understanding of God's Providence working in the world. You yourself will have to make your own decision, and your choice will become a vow when you place it before God in the Sacrament.
There are two paths to salvation: family life and monasticism. Look into your heart and ask it where it wants to go. May God give you wisdom!
Wait a bit
Dear in the Lord K.!
You are bearing a certain harm done within yourself through your practice of occultism, and therefore, do not rush to take up the additional cross of marriage. Do your carpentry work, your wood carving, enter the life of the Church, and pray. The time will come when you will spiritually and physically mature, level out, and then you will feel that you can be a support to another person. Right now you yourself are shaky, so wait a bit before marrying. May God give you wisdom!
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Архимандрит Иоанн (Крестьянкин) |
Dear in the Lord E.!
God's blessing to your family.
You know from your own life what can be accomplished by praying to the Lord. Continue living this way, tangibly sensing the presence of God in your life. Pray!
You will have trials and examinations without fail, and in them will you see yourself, and thus gain a living perception of God, and living repentance.
May God give you wisdom!
Do not forget about God
Dear in the Lord N.!
Do not forget about God, with Him even hardships are not hard, there is no loneliness, and your powerlessness will be strengthened by God's power. People are allowed to be overcome by the confusion of life so that they might understand that we cannot live without God. Now many have crossed the threshold of the Church, but only outwardly, while inwardly they still place their hope in themselves and in other people. Meanwhile the Lord is waiting for us to cleave to Him like children, with our hearts. Only then will everything change in our lives. God's blessing to you and your daughter; of course, your request for prayer is fulfilled.
The swamp of sin
Dear E.!
May God's blessing be upon your studies in the institute, and to diligently finish your course. As for choosing your life's course after the institute—it is too early to speak about that. The swamp of sin seeps into the monasteries no less than into the world, and there are no fewer quagmires, so it all depends on you. If you learn to avoid destructive falls in the world, you will not fall anywhere you chance to be.
Learn from your mistakes
Dear in the Lord M.!
God is the same everywhere: He is in Optina as well as in Dubna; and sin will find a person anywhere. Therefore, do not be confused by thoughts, live where God has led you, and do not tear S. away from work.
If she is inclined towards starting a family, then you need to pray about this and so does she, so that she might not repeat the mistake of your youth, so that she might choose a way of life in harmony with her soul, and receive a proper upbringing.
Who does not make mistakes in life? Do not stigmatize yourself. You have repented, and, glory be to God, you have been forgiven; but you need to extract experience from your mistakes, so that you will be wiser in the future.
May God help you!
Live in the present, in God
Dear in the Lord V.!
We pray for I. with the hope that her sufferings would intercede for her joy. We feel for you and pray, too.
Do not hasten to switch to new tracks of life. Continue the work that you began while your wife was alive, and the future will be in the future. You must live in the present, but in God.
May God give you wisdom!
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
Best not to murmur at all
Dear in the Lord E.!
The name of the batiushka who exorcised you was Archimandrite A., now reposed (Schema-Archimandrite, and his assistant was Nun N.).
I cannot tell you the name of the batiushka who gave you Unction, likewise I cannot tell you whether you should murmur against me or against some other person.
But it would be best if you did not murmur against anyone; for now, my dear, you should already know that our life flows in the Stream of God's Providence, and nothing happens without His holy will.
I will only add that every man goes to meet God's Providence, and is himself the co-creator of his own life. Thus has it happened with you—the Lord gave you the gift of feeling Divine grace, but you have not yet re-sought it, and life has rolled back into its former rut.
Furthermore, your gift has been stolen through unnecessary conversation—you have been robbed by the enemy. Now, against whom are you complaining? If Fr. A. decided to exorcise you, then surely there was something to exorcise you of. He was a godly elder.
But why remember this now? There is no point in crying over spilt milk.
Thank God that you are with the Church, and you are carrying your heavy cross, albeit with murmuring.
The enemy is watching your good intentions, but you are not entirely plundered, I can assure you of that. Your repentance and ceaseless struggle is accounted to you as deeds done for God's sake. This is your life's cross.
Do not despair. Take Communion when you can, no less than every other week, and of course, receive Unction once a year.
Read a chapter of the Gospels and two of the Epistles every day, give your life over to the Lord without murmuring, and willingly bend your neck beneath your life's cross.
May the Lord give you strength!
Do not be hasty
Slave of God B.!
I will immediately tell you the most important thing: you cannot possibly think about being ordained. This would be a ruinous step for you. As for arranging your life, do not be hasty—nothing has yet been resolved in you. At the present moment, you are ready neither for family life as God's Law requires it to be, nor for monastic life.
Thus, labor in the church and pray, start little by little to live as a Christian, binding your sinful self-will.
May God give you strength!
Think through each step in a Christian way
Dear in the Lord O.!
Forgive me for the delay in answering your letter, but such are the circumstances; however, I started praying for you right away. Yes, it is hard and painful to put on the bridle of God's Law, where “playing life” must end and real life must begin, which means bearing your cross. You and your spouse have apparently only entered the outer tabernacle of Christian life and therefore your desires so easily and irresponsibly waver. The fear of God has not yet touched your heart, and you haven't any concept of eternal life.
Therefore I can only talk about externals. I do not know how your court case ended. I only know that you should not have agreed to a divorce.
You cannot be starting from the beginning throughout your entire life, always skimming the surface. It is high time for you to delve [into life], and to dig into the depths ardently and with much sweat. Keep praying for your husband, and ask the apostle of love, St. John the Theologian, for help. Give yourself also to God's will, without building any plans for the future. Learn to think through each step in a Christian way.
May God give you wisdom!
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Архимандрит Иоанн (Крестьянкин) |
Dear C.!
God bless you to finish the education you have started; artists are not only needed in the theatre. But the Lord will determine this in the future. For now, study and make progress, study with love and output, study as an obedience. Do not torment yourself with distracting thoughts.
The main thing is to live for God, for His sake, and do everything to the glory of God. Remember that everywhere and always the most important thing for us is to be Christians in our lives.
May God give you wisdom!
The Lord is one everywhere
Dear in the Lord N. N.!
The Kingdom of God within us ripens irrespective of where we live. The Lord is One everywhere: in Orel, and in Diveyevo. We live in such times that you will also find in Diveyevo things which will confuse and upset you. So, live at home with P., in the God-preserved town of Orel. Do not get too caught up with trains: once a year is fine, but no more. You should work on your soul and not wait until something grows in it that you yourself did not sow.
May God give you wisdom!
God's blessing is not on your moving. Your longing to move is dictated by spiritual voluptuousness.
Absurd thoughts
E. E.!
I am just flabbergasted to hear and read what you have written. You should first at least acquaint yourself with the Orthodox catechism, and take a better look at yourself; I am sure that you will come to the only correct conclusion: you yourself need to learn to live as a Christian.
Just look at what absurd thoughts visit your head. You have a wife blessed by God, even a sick child in her arms, and yet you talk about monasticism. Without any awareness of the essence of Christianity, you play with thoughts about priesthood.
Well, why shouldn't you become a pianist, a surgeon, or an artist? Your answer: you would need to study. But in your opinion study is not necessary in order to teach others the science of sciences: spiritual life? So think about yourself a little deeper.
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Отец Иоанн (Крестьянкин) |
Dear in the Lord A.!
Your question about enclosing yourself in a monastery falls away immediately. One should join a monastery not because his family has broken up, but because his heart is burning with the desire to be saved by a hard way, and to serve God undividedly. Seeing as you have not excluded the thought of starting another family, you obviously do not have this desire.
So live in your house, pray for your former spouse and for your children, and put the latter fully on their own feet.
You cannot be too late for God, and once you have completely paid your parental debt, then the rest of your path will determine itself.
But the path is straightforward: either the restoration of your family, or the way of repentance and sorrows because you were not able to bring your family to God.
No one needs us but God
Dear in the Lord L.!
A man of holy life said once to me, “we are all essentially superfluous, and no one needs us but God.”
My dear, I advise you to remember this all your life, and seek strength and consolation only in God.
As for your wish to live in the village, I will warn you—a woman has no business there alone; there you need not only a head on your shoulders and laboring hands, you also need the support and protection of a man—otherwise there'll be trouble. Therefore, live in the city.
Pray to Martyr Tryphon and St. Spyridon for work and a place to live, and God will console you in time. Do not take offense at your mother. Taking offense is demonic; you should rather feel sorry for her that she does not understand something which is quite essential.
That you will get lost in the world is a thought from the enemy. Banish it.
I receive so many bitter letters from people who are searching for lost loved ones. My heart aches for them, but the hearts of those who write about them are simply breaking. For many it is as the Russian saying goes, “it's crowded together, but it's depressing apart.” Yes, so depressing—to the point of a heart attack.
Be realistic
Dear in the Lord I.!
Your attraction/love should be placed in a bridle. There are more than enough reasons for this. The first and foremost is that you have pretences upon a role of “savioress,” and this is hopeless and sinful.
The second and no less important reason is that because of your differences in age and inward states you should not be together.
Now you have drawn a picture for yourself, but it is not realistic; it is your own imagination. Therefore, the sooner you understand this, the better it will be for you.
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
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| Fr. Ioann (Krestiankin) |
Dear N.!
I congratulate you and your mother with the feast. God's blessing to you and your mother.
However, let Holy Hierarch Theophan [the Recluse of Vysha] give you an answer about monasticism. I am sending you his book, Wise Counsels. Read pages 66 through 95 carefully. With respect to work—just as the Lord did not abandon us before, neither will He now. Pray to Holy Martyr Tryphon, and everything will be all right. Do not lose your equilibrium, little one. You have already had many difficult situations, but it is these things that teach us to energetically turn to God and His saints for help, and to perceive this as our only real and powerful help.
May God give you wisdom and strength.
Discernment will help you decide
Dear in the Lord I.!
You are at the age when you need to choose your life's path. But you should do this yourself, thoughtfully and responsibly, and taking into consideration your own possibilities; for if you are bound by obligations to your family, you have to account for them. Therefore, discernment will help you to decide what you can do at the given moment. You are already singing to God in the monastery choir, but if you do not have the monastic spirit within you, then the world will claim its rights.
Look inside yourself!
You should not make your choice with a fluttering spirit, and without duly considering which cross you are reaching out to take.
Destruction lurks both here and there
Dear in the Lord A.!
Parental blessing builds the house of the children. This is the gift God has given to parents, and therefore you must neither enter a monastery nor get married without your mother's blessing. But before you get her blessing, you yourself must think through everything carefully.
You mentioned your health—this is of no small importance. The monasteries are now being restored, and you need strength and good health. No one will take your illness into consideration. So murmuring and despondency will begin, and that is not salvation, but destruction.
Live for now as you are, my child, with your mother, and try to learn a useful trade. A medic would be both beneficial in the world, and good in a monastery.
So do not hurry, A. There is no pressure—no one is forcing you to marry, nor will the monastery run away from you. When you grow up you yourself will make a conscious choice and set out upon apodvig according to your strength. People save themselves in the world and in the monastery, but destruction lurks both here and there.
Study, A.! The Lord will show you from there. Live with your mother for now.
MAY GOD GIVE YOU WISDOM! THE LETTERS OF FR. JOHN KRESTIANKIN.
Tonsure should be preceded by resolve
Dear in the Lord S.!
Receiving the monastic tonsure should be preceded by our resolve for it, expressed not only in the mind and heart, but by our life itself.
Therefore, do not rush to take the tonsure, but labor with firmness of will for self-crucifixion, and live monastically in the world, knowing only the institute, home, and church.
Then the Lord, seeing your desire, will arrange everything in its own time. And thoughts of marriage do not come up when there is a desire for monasticism.
Hidden in the heart
Slave of God N.!
Peace of soul comes only after a struggle with your passions. In your case, it is easier to do this not in a monastery, but at home. Therefore, live with your mother, and try to be a true Christian daughter.
The future is in God's hands. The Lord will see what will ripen in your heart with time.
Monasticism is not only black clothing, but first and foremost what is hidden in the heart. Clothing is only external and does not always express the true essence. Live with your mother.
May God give you wisdom!
Monasticism is not just clothing
Dear M. and P.!
It is not within my power to fulfill your request. If you were to ask my advice about the thing you have decided to do, I would not advise you to do it.
Monasticism is not just clothing—it is extreme podvig of life. M. can no longer bind herself with monastic podvig due to her health condition. The Lord has given both of you a path to salvation which is brief and clear—M. to bear the burden of illness without murmuring, and you, her husband, to take care of a sick wife—also without murmuring.
Bear your podvig of married life to the end, and the Lord will determine the future when one of you has departed.
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